Sexual Faithfulness by Bryan Sands, Director of Campus Ministries

Posted on September 11th, 2014

Sex is everywhere, from the internet to the real thing. Since eleven years old is the average age a person first views pornographic material and 40 million adults visit pornographic websites, there are a lot of college students and young adults who have seen pornography and experimented with sex. One study shows that by the time a college student becomes a senior, 72% of them have "hooked up" with at least one person.

With those amounts of images in a young adult"s mind, it is no wonder students are constantly thinking of sex and usually don"t think about prolonging it. In addition to the internet and pornographic images, a lot of the sitcoms we watch have themes of "hooking-up" and sex, with little to no consequences. The shift in our culture also means that it is becoming more and more acceptable to do what makes us feel good. Then, on top of that, we see our friends sleeping around and experimenting with sexual acts, so it is no wonder we constantly think of sex. In the words of one pop singer (when she was in her prime) "If it makes you happy, it cannot be all that bad."

It may even seem that everyone is having sex. You may feel pressure because of the preconceived idea that it is what you are supposed to be doing. Or maybe you have that idea simply because of what your friends tell you. Wherever you are in your journey of life, enter the conversation that is rarely initiated, and see if any of this makes sense. Enter the conversation of honoring Jesus with our bodies by being sexually faithful. 

Sexual faithfulness is the idea that we are to remain sexually faithful to our future spouse. If you are married, the concept then follows that you are to remain sexually faithful to your current spouse. The phrase "sexual purity" has the potential of carrying baggage with it in the sense that once you have had sex outside the covenant of marriage, you can no longer be pure. If you have sinned in the area of adultery or fornication, you can always commit to sexual faithfulness again. Jesus desires our repentance and offers His forgiveness. 

Sexual faithfulness has to do with not only our actions but our thoughts as well. Refraining from any inappropriate sexual act is simply not enough. In fact Jesus said, "You have heard that it was said, "You shall not commit adultery." But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:27, 28).

Below you can discuss the questions with a friend or simply answer them yourself. Before you go through the questions below, ask the Lord to reveal what is in your heart.


Questions to Consider

1. What does the phrase "sexual faithfulness" communicate to you?

  • a) How can you be sexually faithful to your spouse or future spouse (if you are not married)?
  • b) How would you describe living a "sexually faithful" life now?

2. Are you honoring the temple of the Holy Spirit inside you?

  • a) 1 Corinthians 6:18-20
  • b) 18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.


3. Are you in a relationship that is not honoring the Lord?

  • a) Do you need to stop that relationship?


4. Is sin sneaking into your life and consequently hurting your relationship with the Lord?



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